Estate Inventory: Clara Mondrian (Cottage 4B)

Fiction

Inventory Date: October 12, 2023 Appraiser: J. Thorne Location: Seaside Cottage, Lot 4B Lot 104. Cylindrical glass jar, 500ml, rubber gasket seal. Contains acoustic residue of a precipitation event dated November 12, 1924. Audio playback occurs upon loosening the lid. Sound is consistent with medium rainfall on slate. Provenance: Kitchen shelf. Condition: Stable. Lot 212. Wall mirror, mahogany frame, bevelled glass. Reflection is offset by exactly forty calendar years. Currently depicts the room as it appeared in 1983. Discrepancy in wallpaper pattern noted. Provenance: Master bedroom. Condition: Frame slightly warped. Lot 308. Tin sewing kit, oval, rusted hinges. Includes three steel needles and one spool of iridescent thread. Thread adheres to non-physical breaches of verbal contract or promises. Application is tedious and requires precision. Provenance: Sewing nook. Condition: Poor. Lot 415. Pocket watch, brass, missing minute hand. Hands rotate counter-clockwise based on the proximity of the observer's regret. No longer tracks linear time. Provenance: Entryway table. Condition: Functional, but useless. Lot 501. Tea set, porcelain, floral pattern. Liquid within the pot remains at exactly 175 degrees Fahrenheit regardless of ambient temperature. Provenance: Kitchen. Condition: Teacup chipped. Lot 612. Iron key, ornate. Opens any door provided the user is approximately two inches off from the correct lock. Provenance: Hallway hook. Condition: Oxidized. Lot 702. Brass hand bell. Rings only when the operator is consciously lying. Output is a high-frequency tone. Provenance: Hallway. Condition: Tarnished. Lot 811. Leather-bound journal, 200 pages. Pages remain blank unless viewed by the original author. Provenance: Nightstand. Condition: Heavily worn. Lot 905. Small wooden box, cedar. Contains the smell of a specific Tuesday in 1956. Scent is primarily ozone and damp wool. Provenance: Closet. Condition: Fair. Notes: The residence is cluttered. The prevalence of metaphysical anomalies is excessive and complicates the filing process. Recommend immediate liquidation to avoid further clerical overhead.